I found this free-write/thick description/poem that I wrote the night after our performance, and am posting it now as my final post for the Reggie Wilson residency.
We open to the audience, the last heel dig into the floor—Ba dum, dum dum, out out, in in…
My peripheral vision on Karlanna
the involuntary inhalation—Anticipation given breath and bone.
I see/hear/feel it successionally/ then all at once, not realizing our unison in breath and body until we feel the pelvis pull back, push front—tiny increments made miles in microsync.
In an exhalation, the span of evolution.
Now there goes the world. It shoots down the elbow and flings from the wrist.
Your side is your front:
A universe of difference where we once walked slow circles in silent space.
The angle of the light. Everything.
Curved over the electric potential—Bang! Cross! Surge into right foot, electric drill spiral down WHOOSH, like turning on the tide in the circle of a dime, is sucks you under and in and down then BURST! You’re up and you see the backs of heads of those around you, then falling
the reminder of gravity’s down. No! Too free, too much force to fall it’s a JUMP down, pulled back into the tide, feet begging contact, legs bend deep deep into the briefest reciprocal
Then up. Thrown like a starfish. “I can’t be up here,” you whisper to the ground
when it’s already nearing over
That force—Unimaginable! A throw AND a tug, it must be. I threw my other self into space into freedom and the rope on my pelvis tugged me and I felt an intake of breath pull up like a yank then I’m a cloud and there’s roaring at my limbs and soft peace that floats at the center
I see ground below
I am slung over cities
,flung over fields
,sprung over seas
There’s enough space up her for ten of me, and in the time it takes to fall
I realize I fly
Nearer to the ground and I’m less—to save myself from the force of so many of me
Plié. And it’s already gone.
Shoulders back as the knee presses forward. I’m down, use my arm, my arm must pull me around and up. Torso cycles over forced arch feet
Arms spiraling side left, down. Clarissa’s yellow presence speeds up and pulls me to join her as we near the horizon, the sound barrier—
then Hit it! Break up, fall and slice the air a satisfying sweep, coupé
arm comes over, I’m down—
“END THIS DANCE!” echoes in my ears then the words are in my blood and they’re pounding against my eardrum, in my pulse, in panting breaths
Huuuh huh huuuuh huh huhh—
Pelvis underneath you. Facing down. Straight leg parallel.
I imagine that my slowing heartbeat
is dimming the lights
that my body is letting this all go,
that it’s not being taken away from me